Overcoming social anxiety is a simple process... on paper. For a person suffering from social anxiety, like myself, it is one of the hardest processes to go through.
We've recorded our thoughts, beliefs, expectations, and analyzed and rated and dissected them.
Now we have to change them. To do this, we have to develop healthier ways to think about and respond to social situations we fear. Bottom line... we need to change the way we think.
We are going to get rid of the “faulty” or negative thoughts and replace them with more realistic and constructive thoughts.
Here are the guidelines for our new thoughts:
- They must be in our own words not some far out techie words
- They must relate or apply directly to the situation. If blushing is the concern, a new thought about sweating won't work.
- They must be realistic. Use I am confident and calm, not, I will not panic
- They must be short and to the point. Our thoughts are so fast we have to learn and memorize our new thoughts so they are second nature and automatic when we have to use them.
The last point above is pretty important. I have a very difficult time applying this one when I am in a social situation and panic is about to begin.
One trick I have learned is to visualize a huge red STOP sign and say the word STOP (in my head). It actually interrupts my negative thoughts and I am able to apply new ones.
Until next time...
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